Thankful Thursday - Unexpected Moments of Awe

Thankful Thursday - Unexpected Moments of Awe

Thankful Thursday – Unexpected Moments of Awe

Monday evening, sitting on the couch finally unwinding from a hellish few days with very sick twin 3 year-olds, feeling a bit lousy myself, a text popped up on my phone. Upon opening it, my breath completely left my body.  Aunt Diane, my father’s youngest sister (youngest of 9 total!) had found a photo of my father at age 6 or 7 that she thought I’d enjoy. I knew it was my father, of course but I was literally staring at my son Reed’s face just a few short years from now. I was overcome with emotion, tears filled my eyes. I was completely in awe. His sweet expression so comforting to me.

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Thankful Thursday - Children "Growing Up"

Thankful Thursday - Children "Growing Up"

Thankful Thursday  - Children “Growing Up”

I became a surrogate when my children were 3 years and 5 years old.  After that, in their minds, in order to get pregnant, you had to go to California where doctors put a baby or two in your tummy.  That was good enough for them, and me, until last year.

My daughter is now 9 years old. Last year we had “the talk” after she began to ask questions.  We read a book together that was very basic and straight to the point.  I spared the details for a more mature age but we have maintained an open dialogue about the subject ever since.

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Thankful Thursday - Awakening

Thankful Thursday - Awakening

My entire life, I’ve often felt like I don’t quite fit in. That folks don’t really “get” me – that I was always lingering on the edges trying to be just like everyone else, to be accepted. Weird, emotional, too serious at times and too silly at other times were things I’ve often heard about myself – especially as a child. Fast forward to trying to start a family with my husband, Wes, living on a US Naval Air Base at the time (where everyone knows everyone’s business) and of course I was again the one on the outside edges, not quite fitting in. Not only was I extremely infertile, I’d also need a gestational surrogate to carry my children – something that most people were completely unfamiliar with. As I’ve gotten older my armor has gotten stronger, I appear fearless to some, but deep down I still have an innate yearning to “fit-in” and here I was – THE most different than everyone around me in my entire life.

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Thankful Thursday - Everything Can Be Used for Good

Thankful Thursday - Everything Can Be Used for Good

I consider myself an “eternal optimist”.  I can almost always find the good in any situation whether in the moment or upon looking back later.  In the past I have stated, “everything happens for a reason”.  Pondering this more this morning, I realized this statement can be naïve, selfish and insensitive.  I have experienced some very traumatic events in my life, and I hate to think those things had to happen to fulfill some higher purpose. 

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Thankful Thursday - The Twins Birthday -Our Greatest Gift

Thankful Thursday - The Twins Birthday -Our Greatest Gift

Thankful Thursday  –  The Greatest Gift

 

To most, 4 x 4 = 16 but in the Kennerly House 4/4/16 will always be the greatest day of our lives (and not just because Wes is a math nerd.) It’s hard to believe that today marks 3 years for Vivian Claire and Reed Robert’s arrival. Words cannot express the gratitude that radiates from Wes and myself each and every day to God and countless people that made our dreams come true after the hardest battle of our lives. Specifically, Dr. Aimee Eyvazzadeh and her relentless drive to be so amazing at what she does (only the very best Reproductive Endocrinologist in the world!) and Cat Dobbs, our former gestational surrogate and now my forever friend and business partner.

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